Yesterday, I posted this email, which I had sent to the Bell Mobility customer retention department. They called last night and basically embarrassed themselves with a nonsensical and frankly, offensively terrible “solution.” The post below is my reply to that phone call, written this morning.

(Not edited for typos)

Hello,

I’m writing again today to express my extreme displeasure at Bell’s “attempt” to correct the situation outlined below.
After writing my original email, I received a call last night around 7:30 p.m. from a Bell representative claiming he had “good news” for me. His so called good news? Bell refuses to replace my BlackBerry Torch, but will give me any new smartphone I want as long as I’m prepared to pay for it and re-up my contract for another three years!

So let me get this straight… Bell has been jerking me around for close to six months now with repair after repair on a phone that is clearly faulty and the only way they’ll fix the situation they created by selling me a faulty phone and giving me terrible service is to force me not only to pay out of pocket, but also to EXTEND MY CONTRACT???

The sad part about all of this is that I’m not asking for an upgrade or some new-fangled toy. All it would take would be for Bell to say, “you know what – you’re right. Your business is important to us. We’ll send you a new Torch.” That would have solved the problem immediately. But to call me and tell me “Bell doesn’t have to guarantee the phones” (those were the guy’s words, not mine) and then try to fool me into paying for a new phone? What kind of moron does Bell take me for?

I would like to make this very clear – not only am I not extending my contract, I am contacting TELUS today via my company to move all of our services to TELUS. We already have a few phones on TELUS plans and the service has been excellent. My wife will also be leaving Bell as soon as it’s convenient for her to do so, and my in-laws have also decided to leave Bell based on my experience.

Bell has made it very clear to me that it does not value my business whatsoever, and frankly, I’m sure whoever will be reading this email will probably laugh at the fact that I’m leaving Bell. Bell doesn’t need me or want my business – I’m happy to oblige.

Thanks for absolutely nothing, Bell – your customer service has been embarrassingly horrific and I ashamed to have been foolish enough to sign with Bell in the first place. I’ll be leaving your company as soon as it’s convenient for me to do so.

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